“Do you know what a bow is?” I stared at him. “A proper bow,” he continued, “is showing respect. It
is also showing the other person that you trust them. You look down when bowing, back straight. You look
the person in the eye during Kumite (sparring). Respect must be shown at all times. Do you understand?”
His voice grew louder upon reaching those last words. Suddenly, out of nowhere, all the students yelled
“Osu!” and bowed perfectly, looking down.

It became clear to my why the characters bowed in anime. Unlike the characters in the anime, though,
while I could learn to bow, I didn’t progress as quickly in karate. Sensei asked me to come before class and
stay until after class. We didn’t practice kicking bags or punching. Without knowing it, sensei gave me
tools to control the things that hindered me outside the dojo.

Meditation was one of those tools. Something as simple as breathing, he taught me, could be the
foundation for everything else one did. In and out. No thoughts. In and out. Clear head. I learned to use this
skill before kumite, before performing kata (forms), while getting frustrated in school and when I felt I was
about to lose my cool anywhere outside the dojo. Over time, I was impressed- meditation, done both in the
morning and evening, really did help get my thoughts under control. I felt better.

I was soon looking at karate as more than just an Olympic sport. It was true that I did enjoy being a
national competitor after a few years of practice, but I couldn’t have become that if I didn’t live karate as a
lifestyle. Sensei taught us about Japan and the people who lived there. We would go as a group to Japanese
restaurants and learned about Japanese food. We would live treating all people as beings that were equal to
ourselves. I came to learn some of his teachings as elements of Buddhism, which I later studied in college. I
began to live life in this manner; helping others became important. So did reducing the complications in my
life. Feeling inspired, I began to participate in helping my community and “being the bigger person” as they
say in America.

Slowly, but surely, I was beginning to gain confidence. I became stronger not only physically, but
mentally. For someone who was a complete outcast, this was greatly beneficial. Most importantly, my
sensei taught me the skill that truly changed my life forever- sensei taught me how to look people in the
eye. Why this is such a big deal to me can be hard for others to understand. Until recently, I had no way to
describe my difficulties. I felt uncomfortable looking people in the eye and being around them. I panicked
when things got slightly tense. I had no hand eye coordination and did not enjoy daily life. I hid from the
world. The word I was looking for was “Asperger’s.” While I was diagnosed with everything else under the
sun, Asperger’s Syndrome, a form of autism, is now something that a doctor says we should explore. They
don’t have a cure, but they have a name.

My sensei made me look at people in the eye for periods of time. He had told me he “just knew” I
needed the help. Doing those drills while taking hits made me more uncomfortable than anything I had ever
done, including getting knocked out, but I couldn’t be more grateful.

I have chosen to study psychology and Asian American Studies, along with Japanese these past four
years. Though I’m not sure where I’m headed, I’ve enjoyed taking psychology courses, learning about
myself, and studying Japanese culture, which I fell in love with. Since karate and studying ways of
Japanese life has helped me so greatly, I intend on giving back to my community. I would love very much
to found a karate program for autistic children.

Regardless of what I do, the skills I have gained have made me who I am today. I can meditate when
my senses are overwhelmed, have self-control and have the confidence that I can learn to overcome
anything. I believe this to be the result of my training and the confidence I developed by living that life. I
truly love Japanese aesthetics. I am confident karate and the Japanese spirit within it changed who I am for
good. So confident, I can look you in the eye and say so.

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